The Procrastination Problem
Procrastination. I am guilty of it; my clients are guilty of it. We have stuff we want to do, but we don't do it.
Why do we procrastinate? Is it a lack of willpower? A lack of desire? Because we are weak and pathetic? Or is it something else?
Here are a few of my theories.
Perfectionism. When I was in school, I would procrastinate until the very last minute on an assignment. I would be rushing to finish a paper before the deadline (it is still a habit today--just ask my nearest and dearest) Deadlines motivate me. So knowing this about myself, I can then know that procrastination is part of my process. No need to panic, no need to guilt myself or beat myself up--I GET something from procrastinating. AND I also lose something: it drives those around me crazy, causes undue pressure on myself, and most importantly, I don't always give my best product. Part of the reason I procrastinate is as a coping mechanism for my perfectionist tendencies--I can only do as well as the time I have been given. So I have to stop working on the task not because it is perfect but because my time is up. If I start the task 2 weeks before it is due, I will drive myself crazy trying to perfect it, so to cope, I tend to procrastinate. While I am working on letting go of my perfectionist tendencies, I can understand that procrastination is part of the process.
Fear. Change is hard. Even baby step change is hard. If you are scared to tackle a new task, you might engage in procrastination. Because we convince ourselves, it is best not to fail. In an attempt to keep us safe and protected, our Monger fills us with messages of comfort and security and the pain of risk and failure. My dad sold insurance and shared his strategies for making cold calls. First thing in the morning, he would sit down at his desk, and his first instinct was to procrastinate on the calls. So he would call someone he knew who wanted to hear from him and give him some positive feedback and energy. THEN he would have the energy to embrace the cold calls. He just needed a little help getting going. Figuring out what is underneath your procrastination and what baby steps you can take to accomplish the goal is helpful. Recognizing that you are procrastinating due to fear is the first step. Then give yourself some room around that. Finally, figure out what step you can take with minimal risk to give you some confidence and energy to keep going.
Maybe now isn't the time. Sometimes the fact that we are procrastinating is a sign that now is not the time. After weeks of procrastination, clients have said, "You know I don't think I want to do ____, I think that is what my procrastination is telling me." I have found that frequently our gut speaks through procrastination. When there is a lot of resistance (aka procrastination) to an activity/change, do a gut check: Am I afraid? Am I too much of a perfectionist? or Is now not the time?